I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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