I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
