My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize