It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
