I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Just high enough for therapy.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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