I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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