She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
