literally had 100 drinks last night.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
