tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
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