What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
