your thong is hanging out like whoa
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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