Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
