never play flip cup with pint glasses
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize