My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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