i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Who died my cat blue again?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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