and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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