So drunk, too bad you don't want this
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
How drunk are you?
Completed.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
