my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
