didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
