I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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