Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
