she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
