Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
We left an ass print on the piano.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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