i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Randomize