I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
