apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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