I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
