he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
