Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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