Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
