Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize
