how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
