Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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