I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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