just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
My feet surprised me
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
