Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
