Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Randomize
