Im at strip club and am horny
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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