3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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