She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize