Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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