We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
You smell like a Billy Joel song
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
