Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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