ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
