Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
