he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
