so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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