doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
