My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Randomize
