Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
