So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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